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Taste the Rainbow….and Unicorns

Working on crossing things off my summer to do list, today I made Unicorn Poop!!

I first saw this done on Instructables and thought it was so frikkin cute! Nothing cutesier than rainbows, glitter and unicorns right?
So even though it’s 95 degrees outside today, and there’s no A/C in my apartment, and I’m sweating my ass off, and the oven heats the whole place…I made cookies.

Ingredients:

  • 1/4 c shortening
  • 1 stick softened butter
  • 1 c sugar
  • 2 eggs
  • 1/2 tsp vanilla …again, measure schmeasure. I poked a hole in the safety seal of my vanilla so I can just give it a squirt or two
  • 2 1/2 c flour
  • 1 tsp baking powder
  • 1 tsp salt

Cream together the shortening, butter, sugar, eggs and vanilla. Use a handheld mixer or a Kitchenaid if you’re lucky enough to have one. You don’t want any butter chunkys in there and I don’t want you to get tennis elbow or whatever the hell injury. Set that business aside. Mix flour, baking powder and salt. Now add the drys into the wets. When you have nice smooth, delicious looking sugar cookie dough; divide it into four separate bowls and add some food coloring.

ooh pretty

I used Duff brand icing coloring because it’s super bright, but the regular stuff works just as well. This website has some good color mixing recipes that should probably work for the amount of dough you’ll have.

Now cover with saran wrap and chill in the fridge for an hour.
Plenty of time for dishes and a coupla beers 😀

Okay, so this is the hard part.
Roll your different colors out into snakes. I found that it was easier to work with small chunks and roll it between my two flattened palms because the dough was so fragile it would break apart when I tried to roll it against the table.  Then connect all my pieces together to form one long snake. Repeat that until you have all your colors rolled out and set up next to one another.

Like dis:

For the next part, I once again broke off a small chunk and rolled it between my paws to make one big, colorful snake. Then I pooped it onto my *ungreased* cookie sheet. Repeat until your tray looks like a herd of unicorns ate at Chipotle and used your kitchen as their biff.

 

 

 

 

 

Remember, you’re making poopies so it doesn’t need to be perfect. Have you ever pooped a perfect spiral?

Bake at 400 for about 10 minutes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So while those bake, I’ll show you all the goodies I got to decorate these poops with:

ooooooh ahhhhhhh

K. So right after your poops come outta the oven, while they’re still soft and hot,  put your sugar pearls on em. (I got black cuz my unicorns are evil, but you can get whatever color you like) This gives them a nice dimension and detail. Like your unicorn was munching on some weird kind of shiny indian corn. Make sure to push them most of the way in though, so they don’t roll off later.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then glaze them with the Sparkle Gel…I like this stuff because if you do a thin enough layer it’ll give the poop a nice glossy sheen and it doesn’t dry horribly sticky.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Top with star sprinkles and shimmer dust and you’re done!

So whimsical!

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